Now somehow Marc has existed for twenty nine years without me.  True for eighteen of those years he lived at home and between his parents and his grandmother, he did not have to make many decisions.  Probably the first big decision he had to make in life was to go to UNC – though I won’t swear by that.

At college, decision making was there but the answer was mutiple choice.  What classes will I take next semester?  Well there are certain ones you have to take so multiple choice if you catch my drift.  What will I have for dinner?  Well again there are options to choose from but it isn’t a blank slate.  What will I eat for breakfast?  Answer- whatever choices they’ve placed in the vending machine for me – of course they better have Poptarts and Dr. Pepper.

Now after college, he went out on his own and up until the point that I began to date him, he has been for the most part on his own.  He has had roomates and girlfriends but I’m not sure that they factored greatly into decision making.  So how were these decisions made?  Now about this I have a theory – I think somewhere there must be a magic eight ball.  Do you know what I’m talking about?  Those little black balls filled with liquid and a crazy sort of shape with multiple faces.  On the bottom of the ball is a window and you shake the magic eight ball as you ask a question.  Turn up the magic eight ball and an answer floats to the top.

Why, you may ask, do I think Marc has/had a magic eight ball?  Thank you for asking.  I will happily tell you.  In the eight weeks, we have been married I think Marc has made a dinner decision perhaps five times.  The standard answer is whatever you want to make or wherever you would like to go.  Don’t get me wrong – at first I thought this was wonderful but somewhere around the twentieth time of decision making for two, I started to get this funny feeling right in the back of my neck.  It was magnified as I considered the possibility that I could live for 40+ more years and everyday I would have to make decisions – dinner decisions, some lunch decisions, movie decisions, and on and on….  That was rather scary, I don’t mind saying.

So the first question I ask is has anyone else experienced this.  I don’t know the wide answer but I did receive a comment when I happened to wonder this aloud in Sunday School one day.  The answer – oh dear I absolutely hate being the only decision maker in my house.  I ask that for Mother’s Day the one thing I don’t want to do is make a decision. Okay, so someone shares my pain and that is a comfort.

The next question I ask what happens to the decision making ability once men marry.  Now don’t get me wrong -they still make decisions but just not decisions about the mundane details of life.  I secretly wonder if I set Marc’s clothes out for him each morning if he’d wear what I put out (mental note to test this at a later date).   And that is why I think there must somewhere be a magic eight ball hiding in our house.  Tonight’s mission – get hubby to sleep and find the ball…. though I fear without food choices written over the maybes and try again it won’t be much use.

Of course I know how things go – it’s easy to fill up free time with nothing.  I honestly don’t want to do that this year and so while I plan to relax and spend time being a newlywed – I also want to have some goals.  So here goes:

1) Organize the house including the junk room – must be done so I can find things!!!

2) Update my blog regularly.

3) Get back to writing on two fronts.

      a) Finish Homecoming because I hate to leave things undone and I want to do this for those who have read and may finish reading.  But even if they don’t – I want to finish for me.

     b) Start my own project – I’ve so many ideas and it’s time to put some to paper.

4) Take a real honeymoon with my hubby – actually this is top priority . 

5) Catch up with friends – especially online ones.

Okay so that seems big enough for right now.  Look for changes – they are a coming.  Which is appropriate considering all the changes my own life is taking.

Tomorrow officially begins Lent.  I can’t believe how time has flown this year.  A season of Lent and it will be time for me to marry practically.  It was while reflecting on this that I had another thought.  I don’t usually really observe Lent.  After all I’m Baptist, very free church tradition.  Yet those who know me, know that I’m really Baptholic – strongly attracted to Catholic tradition yet a Baptist in theology through and through.  Perhaps this year I should do something for Lent.

Of course the usual idea is to give up something for Lent but I’d like to make more than a perfunctory commitment.  So I’ve decided to approach Lent on two fronts.  Prayer and Action. I want to spend 40 days of concentrated prayer effort for two things - my upcoming marriage and social justice.  I then want to put those prayers in action through social justice.  I don’t exactly know how this will look but I really feel the need to be more involved – locally and globally.  I try hard to remember the Persecuted Church regularly but I want to do something more.  I also want to make myself aware of what I can do locally to promote social justice.  So I guess I am giving something up – lethargy and taking up something as well.  I pray that this will be a Lenten Journey of discovery and a deepening relationship with my Lord and Savior.

The wedding is only 68 days away at this point and things are crazy to say the least.  I feel as though there are about a million things to do.  This week invitations are top priority but Marc and I both are getting over terrible colds and the only thing we feel like doing after work is crashing.  Still they have to get done.  First bridal shower is this weekend and I am looking forward to seeing so many friends and family. 

Yet with all the excitement, I think Marc and I both wished we had eloped.  The waiting bit is hard and it gets harder everyday.  And while I know there is an end in sight, it doesn’t make the waiting go faster.  It’s so strange – cause I want the wedding to hurry up and get here, yet I still have so much to do…. but I can’t complain because it’s a beautiful dilemma.

And now for a weekend update…. Marc’s family were able to come up for church on Sunday when the engagement was announced.  It was nice to have them all there and to have lunch with them.  Marc’s best friend Krista came as well and I asked her to be a bridesmaid.  Asking people to be in the wedding is so much fun.  I wish I still had people to ask..lol.  Unfortunately, I didn’t get to talk much with Marc’s Mom about wedding stuff but I hope to visit Richlands with Marc soon and then I’m sure we can take time to talk about it.  I know she’s excited and I love talking about it so it will be great to sit down with her.  It will also be nice to spend time with MaMa (Marc’s grandmother) who gave me permission to call her Mama on Sunday.  I also received permission to call Judy Mom and Ricky Dad… though Marc calls him Daddy and honestly if it’s alright with him and his father, I’d like to call him that too.  It’s been a long time since I called someone Daddy and I’d like the opportunity.

The ring had to make a return trip to the jewelers so my finger feels naked but hopefully I can get it back when Marc goes home to Richlands at the end of August.  Other than that, things have settled somewhat.  The reality of engagement has set in and marriage is right around the corner.  Here’s to an exciting 9 months!!!

“Eliza I want to show you something.”  I turn he’s on one knee but I think he’s only stooped to get a book off the lower shelf.  And I’m thinking he needs my help getting up. Then I see the ring.

“Eliza will you marry me?”

I didn’t say yes right off.  Instead I start yelling “You went home today.  Did you go home today?  You went home today.”

Marc – “Are you going to say yes?”

Me – “YES!!!!”

And then the ring was on my finger and we were hugging.  We even made a lady cry- it was so sweet!!!  I on the other hand didn’t cry at all, instead I bounced.  I bounced down the aisle, down the escalator, out the door of B&N.  I giggled down the mall corridor, down another escalator.  And as I carried my bite to eat to a mall table, I giggled and bounced til I spilled my 32 oz. drink all over the place…lol.  Then we spent forever calling people and there are still more calls and emails to make but that’s the story – I am a fiance, betrothed and an intended cause guess what?  I’m engaged!!!!!!!!!!

Last night, he had a hard night and I was there when he came home.  I was worried because he was rather late getting in but the way he looked when he saw me was nothing but pure joy.  He was so grateful I was there, so thankful for my presence.  Then we ate a late dinner and watched a movie (with me falling asleep).   Normal things but things that are so much better with two than one.  I think that we’d both agree that sometimes all the changes that are taking place are scary.  We wonder if we are ready for marriage and how we will do when it’s not just us we have to think about.  Yet I think we’ve both come to the conclusion that at the end of any day there is nothing better than coming home to each other.

Marc – you are the one constant in my life right now and I’m so grateful to know that you are always there for me!!!!

Twenty two dollars for 40 and they come with the invitation and response card. So at the most I’ll have to spend $88.00 on invites which is fabulous. Yay for wedding bargains that are tres jolie!!! (And seaworthy – hopefully someone gets that)

Now for the title of my post – like a family. Marc and I got to do something neat yesterday. I arrived at his house a few minutes early (I always leave my car there before church) and he was still home. We drove together to church – went into church together. It was wonderful because it felt very much like a family. It makes us both long for next spring when our nuptials will be complete but we can appreciate the sweet foretaste that we receive now and again. After preaching, Marc came and sat beside me. He always does this if he can while the offering is taken but on Sunday he put his arm around me. At one point he leaned over to whisper in my ear which made me smile. What a sweet foretaste of our life together…

And then for our life together…. Marc and I talked until very late last night – too late if the truth be known but it was good. We made some important decisions last night that are for the good of our relationship. It is very strange to me to have someone in my life whose number one priority after God is thinking of my good but it’s very wonderful. We’ve been trying to get in the habit of praying together more regularly and last night we spent time in prayer with our Father. We both fear the end of the dream – waking up from what seems to be a fairtytale at times. Perhaps neither of us ever believed we would find someone to love who would love us back so completely. Yet last night in the middle of the heavy stuff, Marc had a super idea – celebrate the positive. We both took turns telling things that we thought we’d improved at and then we thanked each other. It brought a much lighter spirit to the evening and helped us both focus on what is really important. Marc often says that love is not how he thought it would be and I have to agree with him but in saying that we also mean it’s so much more than we thought it would be. We have less than a year before our wedding and in that time we will celebrate an engagement, Christmas, his birthday, my bridal shower (or two), not to mention a million other things like dinners and parties…. I am looking forward to this time with Marc and I am looking forward to the rest of my life spent in his arms.